Omar And Cedric: If This Ever Gets Weird review

 

Last night I was lucky enough to be one of the few who got to see the world premiere of the Omar & Cedric: If This Ever Gets Weird documentary at the Raindance Film Festival and wow, I am still trying to process it all, as there is a lot in this film to ponder for any fan.

As I've written on this blog before, I've been a fan of Omar Rodriguez-Lopez and Cedric Bixler-Zavala for almost 25 years now and have been lucky enough to see them live in many of their different bands together, firstly with At The Drive-In (at a life-changingly awesome show that started my life-long love affair with their music), to their low-key dub band De Facto, The Mars Volta of course over many different line-up changes and their short-lived make-up project Antemasque (I've also seen the Omar Rodriguez-Lopez Band too, although that is obviously sans Cedric). 

When they announced the film and that it would premiere at the Raindance Film Festival, I thought it sounded amazing but it would be a long wait to see it, probably through some kind of DVD or streaming release years later but then realised that incredibly Raindance was being held in London this year. It seemed especially meaningful as, as I wrote on this blog, seeing the reunited Mars Volta earlier this year, during what has been a difficult time for me, was really a shining moment that captured something and reignited, not just my love for the band, but music itself. 

This year really has been the year of Omar and Cedric for me and getting to be among the first to see this long-promised documentary was certainly an emotional and poignant one and a beautiful way to close my year of Volta.

There had been rumours that Omar and Cedric themselves would attend the screening (someone connected to the film even briefly confirmed it on Instagram before it was deleted) for the Q&A along with director Nicolas Jack Davies, but having now seen the film I can understand why they preferred to stay away (Cedric has seen the film but apparently Omar has only seen an unfinished cut and does not want to see the finished product), although Omar did send Davies an email he read to us all at the end of the screening, telling us he hoped the film showed them as real human beings who just happen to make art inspired by their lives rather than them being "by-products of the music we make" (I can't remember his exact words, but hopefully that is what he meant). He also sees the release of the movie as its funeral, meaning I guess, it's out there now and he wants to move onto other things.

As promised in the trailer, the film is indeed composed almost entirely of home video footage shot by Omar dating back to the 1980s (and some by his family even going back to the 70s). Even though both Omar and Cedric tell their stories through voice-overs attained from extensive interviews, I really feel the film was primarily Omar’s story and it’s just that Cedric is a major part of his life (for instance it delves into Omar’s childhood and family etc in a way it doesn’t do for Cedric). Davies himself, during his Q&A, talked about going to Puerto Rico to meet Omar and the many hours he spent talking to him and working through his extensive footage, and it's clear Omar was heavily involved. Because the footage is primarily from Omar (he's been documenting his life on video since he was a child we are told at the beginning), it's no surprise really that it's more his story and given how private Omar has been in the past (in contrast to the social-media loving Cedric), it actually is quite refreshing to see this musical and personal journey through his eyes. 

The film is divided into three parts (the first being the death of ATDI), the second is about the Volta years and the third brings us up to the present day. Davies said that he wanted to concentrate on Omar's and Cedric's points of views, so no one else is interviewed, it's purely their side of the story, and as I said before, sometimes I felt even Cedric's side wasn't portrayed as thoroughly, but maybe he's already presented his side himself by things he has written or said online and it isn't as necessary or as revelatory as Omar finally opening up.

There were a lot of surprises in the documentary for me, maybe not for others who have followed Volta lore more closely (though I suspect some of the revelations will be new to most), but, off the top of my head here are some of the most notable moments for me:

1. Although it starts at what is the end of At The Drive-In, there is much more ATDI footage than I anticipated and am grateful for, particularly from the time of the making of Relationship Of Command. Omar and Cedric were living together during the making of that album and recording a lot of crazy, fun videos during their downtime (some of the footage is featured in the trailer) but there's also some great stuff showing them in the studio with Ross Robinson. Davies said the Omar always shot more footage when he was happy and having fun and was thrilled at how much great footage there was from that time. As they get further into the tour, things become increasingly stressful and more difficult (it's clear the whole band though struggled with the new violent and macho audience they were attracting) but it's a joy to see it wasn't always that way within the band: there was also a lot of laughter and comradery going on during those years too.

2. Omar really did seem to suffer at the end of first run of ATDI. He was exhausted and conflicted and I think frustrated by his lack of control in that band. He really didn’t get on with Jim Ward, because Ward really was one of the band's leaders but also because he didn't understand some of the pressures Omar was facing and the racism he was experiencing (as it's Omar's side of the story, Jim, not surprisingly, is not portrayed sympathetically, and I suspect there is far more there to that story) but there is some incredibly moving footage when Omar came off stage at their last show in 2001 and was crumpled over in tears and Jim goes over to him and just tenderly hugs him.

3. It sounds like the ATDI hiatus initially really was a hiatus but Jim pushing to do more dates during their six month break pushed them to finally make the leap and form a new band. In some ways, even though Omar obviously did need a mental health break, you can understand why, after years of slaving away trying to make it, Jim (and Paul and Tony) didn't want to lose momentum and waste the opportunity they finally had. Apparently, after their European tour (which I saw them on in London!) De Facto played Jim’s wedding and the next day they informed him they were leaving ATDI for good. Jim did not take the news well and said they would come running back when their new band fails.(Spoiler: they didn't).

4. The beginnings of The Mars Volta is covered extensively and really captures the magic of that moment when it was all coming together. I saw them on that first tour for the Tremulant EP and it really was a magical time seeing the first line-up and the excitement of the new music they were making and the chemistry. There's superb footage from this time but it's heartbreaking to see the downfall of Jeremy Ward, due to his drug use (throughout their drug use is never shied away from, in fact there's plenty of video of them all indulging). Also, I don't know if it's common knowledge in Volta land but I had no idea that Omar and Jeremy were briefly "romantically involved" (as Omar says). The story of Jeremy's death is difficult to watch and Cedric crying while recalling that time was especially harrowing.

5. There's also great footage of the making of De-Loused and Frances The Mute, but the big revelation here is that Cedric had writer's block before the making of their second album and took his inspiration, at Omar's suggestion, instead from a script Omar had written about a woman caught in a cult that forced her to give birth. There's actually video footage of this film Omar shot with, I think, his girlfriend at the time, Danielle Van Ark in the main role. Later, Cedric made up the tale that the story was taken from a diary found by Jeremy during his time working as a repo man. Davies later confirmed that many of the stories told to add a mythology to the albums, including the whole ouja board tale surrounding Bedlam In Goliath, were simply inventions which to be fair I'm sure most suspected, enjoyable as they are.

6. Anyone looking for more insights into albums after Amputechture will be disappointed as they are never really even mentioned. During the Q&A Davies said that Omar thinks only the first three albums are true Volta albums (and the most recent self-titled album is actually the true fourth album). In the documentary Omar does share his disappointment of the way the original line-up faded away but never mentions the fact that they fired drummer Jon Theodore, although we do see footage of Omar putting him through his paces in the studio and his frustration with Omar's demands. Davies also confirmed that Omar didn't film as much after Amputechture because he wasn't as happy during this time, and he and Cedric were drifting apart. In the documentary Omar says the music for him is a snapshot of certain times in his life and listening to it brings back memories from that time, so that definitely makes sense why he isn't so fond of that later era as it must dredge up plenty of bad feelings (although personally I love it). Davies asked Omar what he thought was the high point for the band, and he mentioned a gig in London in 2005 that they had just happened to record in high quality film and it was stored away never seen before. Davies managed to get him to dig it out and rather nicely in the middle of the movie we get two songs from this footage filmed at Brixton Academy, Roulette Dares and The Widow, which does indeed demonstrate how good (and how cool they looked too) when they were at the height of their powers.

7. There is a lot made of the fact that Omar and Cedric were no longer close during this time and Cedric was off having parties at his own house and only drifting in for a couple of hours a day to record vocals, whereas in the early years of the band they were living together and getting up and going straight to making music together. I did wonder how much of the full picture we were getting here because, although it's not mentioned in the doc, Cedric at the time complained that Omar was super-controlling of the music and it was no longer a collaboration, which is kind of backed up by the footage in the film to be honest. In The documentary Omar himself says that people were in Cedric's ear calling him "a little Hitler", which is probably true that there were a lot of people influencing Cedric in a negative way and pulling them apart, but I do think there is certainly truth that Omar himself possibly pushed Cedric away too by his controlling nature and the way Cedric reacted was by, in his own words, "acting the rock star" and trying to do his own thing.

8. The fallout between Cedric and Omar, the part Scientology played into it and the misinformation Cedric fed to the public through his socials was particularly shocking to me. Cedric was definitely going through a lot during this time but he does not come off well. This was when Cedric had met and married Chrissie, and through her was introduced to Scientology. Initially it helped him overcome the drug fuelled lifestyle he had fallen into (by taking a 30 day course to begin with), but eventually, senior Scientologists were turning up at gigs and telling Cedric that Omar was a SP: a suppressive person, basically the reason everything was going wrong for him. When Omar discovered Cedric had quit the band through a Twitter post, he was actually directing a film and he was so thrown off and hurt by his former best friend's announcement that he couldn't continue the movie. Cedric at the time said that he was the one who wanted The Mars Volta to continue "but instead we got Bosian Rainbows" (Omar's band with his girlfriend Teri). It turns out that Cedric actually demanded Omar stop doing his solo records and that he be given time to record a solo record himself (the Zavalaz album that was recorded but never came out) and Bosnian Rainbows was Omar's concession, while Cedric did his own thing. So the narrative Cedric gave to the public was completely misleading at the time and, as Omar says himself, made him out to be the villain, which you can tell hurt him deeply. The director at the end said that Cedric now says he recognises that he was not acting like himself during this time and had become another person altogether.

9. Cedric actually made Omar take a Scientology initiation course before agreeing to meet with him again! And Omar did it in order to try and win back his best friend. When Omar aced his courses Cedric agreed to see him, that's when they finally started making amends (again Cedric becomes tearful talking about seeing Teri and Omar with his children). Omar also admits that Antemasque, the album they made after Cedric asked him if he would consider working with him again, was not the kind of music he wanted to make. He says it was only made in order to heal his relationship with Cedric by trying to do something that appealed to him. To me it does sound like Cedric enjoyed making that album and it's partly why I love it but it certainly explains why we never saw that second album we were promised.

10. The timeline regarding the At The Drive-In reunion is pretty inconsistent in the film which was a little confusing, as in reality it came after the death of Omar's mother (which is very movingly told) but in the documentary itself comes later. It's also admitted that the ATDI reunion was financially motivated, essentially because Cedric needed money and initiated by him. In addition to this, it's revealed that it was Cedric who fired Jim the second time around, although Omar voted to keep him in the band. Omar says that Jim told them that it would financially ruin him to kick him out of the band, so there's no doubt they were pretty ruthless in doing so. Again, we don't have Jim's side of the story here but apparently he was turning up late, unprepared, unhappy to be there although I'm sure the old problems with Omar still remained and that played a huge part.

11. The fact that they actually address the romance between Omar and Teri was a nice surprise. The tale of how they realised they were falling in love and the video footage of her teasing Omar was rather lovely. Again, although we hear how Cedric met his wife ("I couldn't believe this 6ft goddess was interested in me"), there is pretty much no footage of her and only a few photos, which again plays into my assertion that this is more Omar's story than Cedric's. That said, the Danny Masteron rape trial (if you didn't know Chrissie was bravely one of the Jane Does who reported him) is talked about and, although it isn't explicitly said, it's clear this was the reason for the couple finally pulling away from Scientology, which of course led the way for Omar and Cedric's final reconciliation.   

The film ends with where they are now, reunited and touring again, older and wiser and hopefully stronger than before. Needless to say I loved the film and thought it captured them as people, good and bad, and not just musicians (because ultimately it's more a story of their friendship and the ups and downs of their relationship rather than a blow by blow account of their musical career), in such a brutally honest way that was unique and refreshing. There's no doubt it was heavy going emotionally, but I actually can't wait to see it again. 

Although the title comes from a plea Omar once made to Cedric, that "if it ever gets weird, promise me we can just stop," and it certainly did get very weird, I am so grateful they haven't stopped and still continue to grow and endure. Long may they run.